IF LIFE WAS A BOAT AND/OR IF WE LIVED ON ONE

there is no stopping

MOVEMENT and

MOVEMENT won't feel so bad

because

it's just what happens. Floating along

out of our control

waves pushing you

and me

to destinations unknown,

but where we're meant to be.

AND MAY WILL ALWAYS TURN INTO JUNE

There are crumbled petals,

and Tina's at the door

tongue sucking on teeth, walking the

neighborhood

with her accordion. Hatching plans.

There are these animals, she says

steal other animal's eggs.

when they hatch

it's always a surprise.

tina used to take her shirt off at parties.

go "wooooooooo!"

the night before i left I helped her rearrange her living room.

we shared a coke. Listened to Korean pop music.

I'll miss bringing you flowers, I murmur

curled up on the stiff couch

on the East wall-

Tina placed between two windows,

on the West.

she walked me home. "There's so much room in the world for

us".

Her slight hands make quick work

of the accordion keys.

this-night-is-the-winter-solstice-the-full-moon-and-a-lunar-eclipse-today-is-important-to-make-a-big-wish-that-you-swallow-whole-to-not-just-wish-it-but-breathe-it-and-visualize-it-feel-the-wish-materialize-in-your-blood-in-your-self

i shout LOUDLY

to the little faces moving steady on

the train not stopping even

though all the passengers

look like ghosts ghosts ghosts.

you're just a little wretched dirty thing

eaten up

by that old goat

blossoming evil

in his belly.

PLAY THE MOOD FOR A LONG TIME

Happy birthday!

we can't get enough

play kick the can

stick ball

beat down the tiny paper horse strung from that old cherry tree.

Remember when we sat in those swings?

when you said you loved me?

I wouldn't do it either.

I wouldn't leave this old thick life

shredded with a tin grater

for an abandoned house.

hey, no hard feelings.

and...Happy Birthday. Seriously.

I LOOK TO THE EAST

raining soaking wet

the soles of my shoes

feet

inner being.

are wet.

i want to jerk off

and cry

and punch

you.

which means me.

all those starched pieces of paper, little fortunes put in cookies- you will be successful.

you are in ruins.

which means me.

step outside where the flatulent air puffs right back on your face.

you're awake, get over it.

HOW DARE YOU keep beating in my chest,
mocking me.

steady.
continuous.
it's not enough!

how DARE you.